Coach Leadership Qualities

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question might be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others don’t have to either. It is something like that. You know, like there’s a real injunction at the base of it. It is not some casual self-help doctrine. It’s that if you don’t organize yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a significant way. And so will the people around you today, and you could say, well, I do not care about that, but that is actually not true. You actually do care about that because if you’re in pain, you will care about it. And that means you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it’s very rare that you can find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this form of pain is one of those things that brings the notion that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more dumb pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to this, and this is a phenomenological idea, too. It is something like, look around for something that bothers you and see if you’re able to repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do it in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you’re sitting in a room like a room, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I have to do?

And you have to ask yourself this, right? It is not a command. It’s like a genuine question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, just like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there would be a fantastic thing. And you know, you haven’t, there is some crap behind your computer screen that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the space would be marginally better if it was somewhat less dusty and the cables, were not all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you let yourself just to consider the expanse where you exist at that moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it which you could just fix. And, you know, I might say, well, if you were coming to see me for psychotherapy, this easiest thing for us to do would just be to get you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the constraints of your being. And I Would say begin where you are able to start.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, that you could repair, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat daily, because people usually think of those as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you have your routines which you go through every day. Well, those likely constitute 50% of your life. And people think, well, they’re mundane. I don’t need to listen to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out right away. So a hundred alterations to your wider domain of being, and there’s a lot less rubbish and there is a great deal less rubbish around it.

A good deal fewer traps that you step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis as soon as you’ve got your mind and your emotions together, and once you’re acting out that, then it is possible to extend what you’re willing to consider yourself itself and begin fixing up the things that are a part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you might say, imagine you’re walking down Bloor street and there is this man who’s like alcoholic and schizophrenia and has been on the streets for 10 years. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be useful if you could repair it, but you, have not got a clue about how to fix that. You just walk around that and go find something you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it’s very likely you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it’s you right then and there, that should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you don’t walk up to a helicopter which isn’t working and just start tinkering away with it. You have to stay within your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the idea of the room as you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you return to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for half an hour.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it is partly because your head is a really strange thing. The moment you give it a name, a genuine aim, it will reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That’s really how you see to begin with. And so if you set it a task, especially you’ve got to be genuine about it, which is why you have to bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you must get them in your body. So you are acting consistently. You have to be genuine about the aim, but once you aim, the world will reconfigure itself about that aim, which is extremely strange. And it’s, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of this, you’ve all seen this video where you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the center of the video and don’t see it.

It is like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for about five decades, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you’re able to get 1 thing through your head and as a result of even being in college, that would be a good one. You see what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from that is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
The way the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative way, one thing to ask is, are you planning at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I am not trying to reduce everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for a variety of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there is a random element to being that is for sure. But, and so you don’t want to take anythingthat particular phrase too far, you need to bind it together with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it’s still a terrific thing to ask.