Coaching And Leadership Development

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step one step backwards. The first question might be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others don’t have to either. It is something like that. You know, like there’s a real injunction at the base of it. It’s not some casual self-help doctrine. It is that if you do not arrange yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you now, and you could say, well, I don’t care about that, but that’s actually not true. You truly do care about that because if you are in pain, you will care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s just that negative way, you know, it’s very rare you could find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I had been out of this form of pain is one of those things that brings the idea that it would be better if it did not exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there isn’t any more dumb pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question may be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to this, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It’s something like, look around for something which disturbs you and see if you’re able to fix it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do it in a room. It’s quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room just like a room, possibly your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I have to do?

And you have to ask yourself this, right? It’s not a command. It’s like a real question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, just like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there would be a good thing. And you know, you haven’t, there’s some crap behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended to for like six months. And the room would be slightly better if it was a little less dusty and the wires, weren’t all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to consider the expanse in which you exist at that moment, there will be all sorts of things. That will pop out in it which you could just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you were coming to see me for psychotherapy, this simplest thing for us to do would just be for you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say start where you can begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to fix the things you repeat every day, because people usually think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you have your breakfast. You know, you’ve got your routines which you go through daily. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your life. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to listen to them. It’s like, no, no, that’s exactly wrong things you do every day. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out immediately. So a hundred adjustments to your wider domain of being, and there is a lot less rubbish and there’s a great deal less crap around it.

A good deal fewer traps that you step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s idea about erasing the dis as soon as you’ve got your mind and your emotions together, and as soon as you’re acting that out, then it is possible to extend what you’re prepared to consider yourself and start fixing up the things that are a part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you’re walking down Bloor street and there’s this guy who’s like alcoholic and schizophrenia and has been on the streets for 10 years. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be good if you could fix it, but you, have not got a clue about how to fix that. You simply walk around that and go find something you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it is very likely that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it is you right then and there, which should repair them. You must have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter that is not working and just begin tinkering away with it. You have to remain in your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room because you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you return to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I will make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will just pop up like mad. And it’s partly because your head is a really strange thing. The moment you give it a title, a real aim, it will reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That is actually how you see to begin with. And so if you set it a job, especially you have to be real about it, which is the reason why you must bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you have to get them on your body. So you’re acting consistently. You’ve got to be genuine about the aim, but once you aim, the entire world will reconfigure itself about that goal, which is extremely strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of that, you have all seen this video in which you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and don’t see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for around five years, that would be about the ideal amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you can get 1 thing through your mind and as a result of even being in university, that would be a great one. You see what you aim at. And so, because one inference you might draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the right thing? Now?

You know, I am not trying to decrease everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People today get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have injuries, there is a random element to being that is for sure. But, and that means you don’t need to take anythingthat specific phrase too far, you need to bind it together with the fact that random things do happen to people, but it is still a great thing to ask.