Equity Leadership Coaching

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question may be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I believe the answer to that is some thing like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there’s a real injunction at the base of it. It’s not some casual self-help doctrine. It’s that if you don’t organize yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you now, and you may say, well, I don’t care about that, but that’s actually not true. You actually do care about that because if you are in pain, you will care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it is very rare you could find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this form of pain is one of the things that brings the idea that it would be better if it did not exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to that, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It is something like, look around for something which bothers you and see if you can fix it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do it in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you’re sitting in a room like a space, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I must do?

And you need to ask yourself that, right? It’s not a command. It is like a real question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there are a fantastic thing. And you know, you haven’t, there’s some crap behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended to for like six months. And the room would be slightly better if it was somewhat less dusty and the wires, weren’t all tangled up the same way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to think about the expanse in which you exist at the moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it which you could just fix. And, you know, I might say, well, if you were coming to see me for psychotherapy, this simplest thing for us to do first would just be to get you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say start where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, that you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You mend a hundred things like that. Your life will be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat daily, because people tend to think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you have your breakfast. You know, you have your routines that you go through daily. Well, those likely constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they’re mundane. I don’t need to listen to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do every day. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out right away. So a hundred adjustments to your broader domain of being, and there is a lot less crap and there is a lot less rubbish around it.

A lot fewer traps that you step into. And so that is in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions together, and once you’re acting out that, then it is possible to extend what you’re prepared to consider yourself itself and start fixing up the things that are a part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you might say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there is this guy who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for 10 years. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be useful if you could fix it, but you, haven’t got a clue about how to fix that. You just walk around that and go find something you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it is very likely that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, does not mean that it is you right then and there, which should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter which is not working and just start tinkering away with it. You have to remain in your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it is very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room as you can do this at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for half an hour.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it is partly because your mind is a really strange thing. As soon as you give it a title, a real aim, it’ll reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That’s actually how you see to begin with. And so if you set it a job, especially you have to be real about it, and that’s why you must bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you must get them in your body. So you’re acting consistently. You have to be genuine about the aim, but once you aim, the world will reconfigure itself around that aim, which is extremely strange. And it’s, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of this, you have all seen this video in which you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and don’t see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for about five decades, that would be about the ideal amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that guy, if you’re able to get one thing through your head and as a consequence of even being in college, that would be a great one. You see what you aim at. And so, because one inference you might draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative way, one thing to ask is, are you planning at the right thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to decrease everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there’s a random element to being that is for sure. But, and that means you don’t want to take anythingthat specific phrase too much, you want to bind it with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it’s still a great thing to ask.