Invenire Leadership Coaching

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step one step backwards. The first question may be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you need to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there is a true injunction at the bottom of it. It’s not some casual self-improvement philosophy. It is that if you do not arrange yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you today, and you may say, well, I do not care about that, but that’s actually not true. You actually do care about that because if you’re in pain, you will care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s just that negative way, you know, it is very rare you could find somebody who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this form of pain is one of the things that brings the notion that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to that, and this is a phenomenological idea, too. It is something like, look around for something that bothers you and see if you’re able to fix it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do this in a room. It’s quite fun to do it. Just when you’re sitting in a room like a space, possibly your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I must do?

And you need to ask yourself that, right? It’s not a command. It is like a genuine question and things will pop out in the room that, you know, like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there are a good thing. And you know, you have not, there is some rubbish behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the room would be slightly better if it was a little less dusty and the wires, were not all tangled up the same way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to think about the expanse in which you exist at the moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it which you could just fix. And, you know, I might say, well, if you were coming to see me for childbirth, this easiest thing for us to do first would just be for you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the constraints of your being. And I Would say begin where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, that you could repair, then Hey, fix it. You mend a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a lot different. Now, I often tell people to fix the things you repeat every day, because people tend to think of those as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you have your routines which you go through every day. Well, those likely constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t have to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that’s exactly wrong things you do every day. Those are the most important things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You’ve figured out right away. So a hundred adjustments to your broader domain of being, and there’s a lot less crap and there’s a lot less rubbish around it.

A lot fewer traps for you to step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s idea about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and as soon as you’re acting out that, then you can extend what you’re prepared to consider yourself itself and begin fixing up the things which are part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you’re walking down Bloor street and there is this man who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for a decade. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be good if you could fix it, but you, haven’t got a clue about how to repair that. You just walk around that and go find something you could fix, because if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it is very probable you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it’s you right then and there, that should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter that is not working and just start tinkering away with it. You need to remain in your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the idea of the room as you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you return to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will just pop up like mad. And it is partly because your head is a really strange thing. The moment you give it a name, a real aim, it’ll reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That is really how you see to begin with. And so if you set it a task, especially you’ve got to be genuine about it, and that’s the reason why you must bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you have to get them on your body. So you are acting consistently. You’ve got to be real about the aim, but once you aim, the world will reconfigure itself around that aim, which is very strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of this, you have all seen this video where you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and do not see it.

It is like, you know, in case you thought about that experiment for around five years, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that guy, if you’re able to get 1 thing through your head and as a consequence of even being in university, that would be a good one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you might draw from that is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
The way the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative way, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the right thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to decrease everybody’s problems to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there’s a random element to being that is for sure. But, and so you don’t want to take anythingthat specific phrase too far, you need to bind it together with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it’s still a great thing to ask.