James Rowan Fire Leadership Coach

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question might be, why should you bother improving yourself? And I believe the answer to that is some thing like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there is a real injunction at the bottom of it. It is not some casual self-improvement philosophy. It’s that if you don’t arrange yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you today, and you may say, well, I do not care about that, but that is actually not correct. You truly do care about that because if you’re in pain, you may care about it. And that means you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it’s very rare that you can find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this sort of pain is one of the things that brings the idea that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there isn’t any more dumb pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question may be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to that, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It is something like, look around for something which bothers you and see if you’re able to repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do this in a room. It’s quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room just like a space, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I have to do?

And you need to ask yourself this, right? It is not a command. It’s like a genuine question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, just like there’s a heap of papers over there. That’s sort of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there would be a good thing. And you know, you haven’t, there’s some crap behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the room would be marginally better if it was somewhat less dusty and the cables, weren’t all tangled up the same way. And like, if you, if you let yourself just to consider the expanse where you exist at the moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That will pop out in it that you can just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you’re coming to see me for psychotherapy, this simplest thing for us to do would just be for you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the constraints of your being. And I Would say start where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You mend a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat every day, because people tend to think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you’ve got your routines that you go through daily. Well, those likely constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t have to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that’s exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the most important things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You’ve figured out right away. So a hundred alterations to your wider domain of being, and there is a lot less crap and there’s a great deal less rubbish around it.

A good deal fewer traps for you to step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s idea about erasing the dis as soon as you’ve got your mind and your emotions together, and once you’re acting out that, then you can extend what you’re prepared to consider yourself and begin fixing up the things that are a part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you’re walking down Bloor street and there is this man who’s like alcoholic and schizophrenia and has been on the streets for a decade. He sort of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be useful if you could fix it, but you, have not got a clue about how to repair that. You simply walk around that and go find something that you could fix, because if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it’s very probable that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it is you right then and there, that should repair them. You must have some humility. You know, you don’t walk up to a helicopter that isn’t working and just start tinkering away with it. You need to remain within your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it is very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the idea of the room because you can do this at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I will make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it’s partly because your mind is a very strange thing. As soon as you give it a title, a genuine aim, it will reconfigure the entire world in keeping with this goal. That is really how you see to begin with. And so in case you set it a task, especially you’ve got to be real about it, which is why you have to bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you have to get them on your body. So you’re acting consistently. You’ve got to be genuine about the aim, but once you aim, the world will reconfigure itself about that aim, which is very strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically true. You know, the best example of that, you’ve all seen this video where you watch the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and do not see it.

It is like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for about five decades, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that guy, if you can get 1 thing through your mind and as a consequence of even being in college, that would be a good one. You see what you aim at. And so, because one inference you might draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
The way the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to reduce everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People today get cut off at the knees for a variety of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there’s a random element to being that’s for sure. But, and that means you don’t need to take anythingthat specific phrase too much, you need to bind it with the fact that random things do happen to people, but it’s still a terrific thing to ask.