Leadership Coaching Technical Attributes

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question might be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I believe the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others don’t have to either. It is something like that. You know, like there’s a true injunction at the bottom of it. It’s not some casual self-help doctrine. It’s that if you don’t arrange yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a significant way. And so will the people around you today, and you could say, well, I don’t care about that, but that’s actually not true. You truly do care about that because if you’re in pain, you may care about it. And that means you do care about, even if it’s just that negative way, you know, it is very rare you could find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this form of pain is one of the things that brings the notion that it would be better if it did not exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more dumb pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the reply to this, and this is a phenomenological idea, too. It is something like, look around for something which disturbs you and see if you’re able to repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do it in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you’re sitting in a room just like a room, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I have to do?

And you have to ask yourself that, right? It is not a command. It is like a real question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, just like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s sort of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there would be a good thing. And you know, you haven’t, there’s some crap behind your computer screen that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the space would be marginally better if it was a little less dusty and the wires, weren’t all tangled up the same way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to think about the expanse in which you exist at the moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That will pop out in it which you can just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you’re coming to see me for childbirth, this easiest thing for us to do first would just be for you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say start where you are able to start.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, that you could repair, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat daily, because people tend to think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you have your routines which you go through every day. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t have to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do every day. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You’ve figured out immediately. So a hundred adjustments to your wider domain of being, and there is a lot less crap and there’s a great deal less rubbish around it.

A lot fewer traps for you to step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions together, and once you’re acting out that, then you can extend what you’re prepared to consider yourself and start fixing up the things that are a part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you don’t know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there’s this man who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for 10 years. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be useful if you could fix it, but you, haven’t got a clue about how to repair that. You simply walk around that and go find something that you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it is very probable that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it’s you right then and there, which should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you don’t walk up to a helicopter that isn’t working and just begin tinkering away with it. You have to remain within your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lifestyles, you know, it is very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room because you can do this at the drop of a hat. You know, you return to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I will make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it is partly because your head is a really strange thing. As soon as you give it a name, a real aim, it will reconfigure the entire world in keeping with that aim. That is actually how you see to start with. And so in case you set it a task, especially you have to be real about it, which is why you have to bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you must get them in your body. So you’re acting consistently. You have to be genuine about the aim, but once you aim, the world will reconfigure itself about that aim, which is extremely strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically true. You know, the best example of this, you have all seen this video in which you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the center of the video and do not see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for about five years, that would be about the ideal amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you can get 1 thing through your mind and as a consequence of even being in college, that would be a good one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from that is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you planning at the right thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to reduce everybody’s problems to an improper aim. People today get cut off at the knees for a variety of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have injuries, there is a random element to being that is for sure. But, and so you don’t want to take anything, even that particular phrase too far, you need to bind it together with the fact that random things do happen to people, but it is still a terrific thing to ask.