Leadership Style Of Coaching

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question may be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I believe the answer to that is some thing like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you need to. And maybe so others don’t have to either. It is something like that. You know, like there is a real injunction at the base of it. It’s not some casual self-help doctrine. It’s that if you don’t arrange yourself properly, you’ll pay for it and in a significant way. And so will the people around you today, and you may say, well, I don’t care about that, but that’s actually not true. You actually do care about that because if you are in pain, you will care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s just that negative way, you know, it’s very rare you could find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this form of pain is one of those things that brings the notion that it would be better if it did not exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there isn’t any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to this, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It is something like, look around for something that disturbs you and see if you’re able to repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do it in a room. It’s quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room just like a room, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I must do?

And you have to ask yourself that, right? It’s not a command. It is like a genuine question and things will pop out in the room that, you know, like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s sort of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there are a good thing. And you know, you have not, there’s some crap behind your computer screen that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the space would be marginally better if it was somewhat less dusty and the cables, were not all tangled up the same way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to think about the expanse in which you exist at that moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That will pop out in it that you could just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you’re coming to see me for childbirth, this simplest thing for us to do first would just be to get you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends upon how you conceive the constraints of your being. And I Would say begin where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, that you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life will be a lot different. Now, I often tell people to fix the things you repeat every day, because people usually think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you have your routines which you go through every day. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to listen to them. It’s like, no, no, that’s exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the most important things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out immediately. So a hundred adjustments to your broader domain of being, and there is a lot less rubbish and there’s a great deal less rubbish around it.

A lot fewer traps that you step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s idea about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and once you’re acting that out, then it is possible to extend what you’re willing to consider yourself itself and begin fixing up the things which are a part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there’s this guy who’s like alcoholic and schizophrenia and has been on the streets for a decade. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be good if you could fix it, but you, haven’t got a clue about how to fix that. You simply walk around that and go find something you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it’s very likely that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it is you right then and there, which should repair them. You must have some humility. You know, you don’t walk up to a helicopter that isn’t working and just begin tinkering away with it. You need to stay in your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lifestyles, you know, it is very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the idea of the room because you can do this at the drop of a hat. You know, you return to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it is partly because your mind is a very strange thing. The moment you give it a title, a real aim, it will reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That’s actually how you see to start with. And so in case you set it a job, especially you have to be genuine about it, which is the reason why you have to bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you have to get them on your body. So you are acting consistently. You’ve got to be real about the aim, but once you aim, the entire world will reconfigure itself around that goal, which is extremely strange. And it’s, it’s, it’s technically true. You know, the best example of this, you’ve all seen this video where you watch the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and don’t see it.

It is like, you know, in case you thought about that experiment for about five years, that would be about the ideal amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that guy, if you can get 1 thing through your mind and as a consequence of even being in college, that would be a great one. You see what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
The way the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the right thing? Now?

You know, I am not trying to reduce everybody’s problems to an improper aim. People today get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there’s a random element to being that’s for sure. But, and so you don’t want to take anything, even that specific phrase too far, you want to bind it together with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it’s still a great thing to ask.