True North Leadership Coaching

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question might be, why should you bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you need to. And maybe so others don’t have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there is a true injunction at the base of it. It’s not some casual self-help doctrine. It’s that if you don’t arrange yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you now, and you could say, well, I don’t care about that, but that’s actually not correct. You actually do care about that because if you’re in pain, you may care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it’s very rare that you can find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I had been out of this sort of pain is one of the things that brings the notion that it would be better if it did not exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question may be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to this, and this is a phenomenological idea, too. It’s something like, look around for something that disturbs you and see if you’re able to fix it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do this in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room like a room, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I have to do?

And you need to ask yourself this, right? It is not a command. It’s like a real question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, like there is a heap of papers over there. That’s sort of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there are a fantastic thing. And you know, you haven’t, there is some crap behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended to for like six months. And the space would be slightly better if it was a little less dusty and the cables, weren’t all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to consider the expanse where you exist at the moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That will pop out in it which you can just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you’re coming to see me for childbirth, this simplest thing for us to do first would just be to get you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends upon how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say start where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, that you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You mend a hundred things like that. Your life will be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to fix the things you repeat every day, because people tend to think of those as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you have your routines that you go through every day. Well, those likely constitute 50% of your life. And people think, well, they’re mundane. I don’t have to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the most important things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out right away. So a hundred adjustments to your broader domain of being, and there is a lot less rubbish and there’s a great deal less crap around it.

A good deal fewer traps for you to step into. And so that is in keeping with Ewing’s idea about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions together, and once you’re acting that out, then it is possible to extend what you’re willing to consider yourself itself and begin fixing up the things which are a part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you don’t know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there’s this man who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for a decade. He sort of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be good if you could repair it, but you, have not got a clue about how to fix that. You simply walk around that and go find something you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it is very probable you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it is you right then and there, which should repair them. You must have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter which is not working and just start tinkering away with it. You have to stay within your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room as you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for half an hour.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it is partly because your head is a really strange thing. The moment you give it a title, a genuine aim, it will reconfigure the entire world in keeping with that aim. That is really how you see to start with. And so in case you set it a task, especially you have to be genuine about it, which is why you have to bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you must get them on your body. So you’re acting consistently. You’ve got to be genuine about the aim, but once you aim, the world will reconfigure itself about that goal, which is extremely strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically true. You know, the best example of this, you’ve all seen this video in which you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and do not see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for about five decades, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you’re able to get one thing through your head and as a consequence of even being in university, that would be a great one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you might draw from that is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative way, one thing to ask is, are you planning at the right thing? Now?

You know, I am not trying to reduce everybody’s problems to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have injuries, there’s a random element to being that’s for sure. But, and so you don’t want to take anythingthat particular phrase too much, you want to bind it together with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it is still a terrific thing to ask.